My birthday is coming up.
*happy birthday to me*
I’ve found that once you hit 18 time flys. It’s like I celebrated my 18th birthday then my 21st and now I’m nearly 24. Yup… 24! I know I’m not old and will probably be chastised for having a little rant about how fast time has gone but 24 is a serious age. Most of my friends have children, are getting married or have a mortgage to think about – maybe even all three. But me, I’m just trying to get through the year figuring out what I want to do with my life… A career. I’ve always been very career orientated and know that one day I will be successful. I work hard and once I know what I want nothing will stop me from achieving it. Something my parents instilled in me from a very young age.
The past couple of years have been extremely difficult for me. I won’t bore you will all the details but I discovered I had a illness which left me unable to work, by the time the doctors had given me a diagnosis and a lifelong plan with an array of medications to ‘cure’ me I was out of work and a bit lost.
For someone who had never been out of work and built a fairly successful career in Visual Management I didn’t know what to do. My life had changed completely. I had a illness to deal with which will affect me for the rest of my life and now I needed to start again. Applications. Interviews. Work. Career. Life.
I’ve come to realise that I have an amazing support group around me. My friends and family are everything and thank them for all they have done for me during the hardest phase of my life so far. I’ve always been the one out of my friendship group who never needed advice on work life, I would be the one to have a five year plan and wouldn’t stop until I achieved it. But now I’m the one who needs guidance. My current situation is challenging but quite exciting where I can do anything or go anywhere. This is where the difficulty stands. What do I want to do? Where do I want to go? Even if I had decided on the dream job the problem lies in the fact that it seems nowadays to get into a new career path you need to know someone to get your foot on the door. Or your one of thousands of applicants so you don’t even get noticed. The naive me never of thought it would be this difficult to decide on what I want to do or who I want to be. Maybe it’s because by now I thought I would be well on my way to a successful career path and not starting again searching my brain for ideas and ventures.
Realistically I know that I have time on my side. I mean come on, I’m only just turning 24. But I put an immense amount of pressure on myself to do well and I know to achieve and reach success I need to pick a path and commit. It’s demoralising for me to think that this ‘decision’ time feels like wasted space – like I’ve just lost years of my life thinking and being ill.
So after all that waffle my thoughts are that I feel a bit lost. I need to pull myself together and commit! For someone who thrives on pressure and loves the working environment (yes I said it, I love to work. You may call me strange but it’s true) I need to start building a career and throw myself into it… I know the right thing is out there.
Just got to find it.
I know this isn’t my usual type of post but I appreciate you sticking with me until the end. Have any of you been in a situation where you started again? How did you focus and get yourself back in the right direction?